As a reward for needlessly sullying Diddy's reputation, Los Angeles Times reporter Chuck Philips will keep his day job. [NYT]

• Daniel Dae Kim racks up another Lost DUI.

• Helen Mirren hates the miracle of childbirth.

• Larry Craig receives an unwelcome blast from the past.

• Notorious B.I.G. gets (yet another) Life After Death.

• A volunteer French firefighter suddenly remembers Princess Diana's dying words.

• Thug contemplates sexual assault, opts to make off with stolen iPod instead.

• The sky is falling! No, wait, that's just Teri Hatcher's face.

• We don't have to travel back in time to remind ourselves that Kevin Federline is a weasel.

• Is it wrong that we like Ryan Reynolds even more now that we now he has zero plans to adopt an African orphan anytime in the near future?

• Maria Sharapova may have lost only 2 games so far in 4 straight sets of tennis, but Anna Kournikova's still the only one who can carry off a potato sack.

• Britney Spears to disappear. Sheesh, it's about frickin' time!

• For the last time, Sienna Miller and Rhys Ifans are not dating, okay? They're just getting ridiculously drunk and then fucking afterwards.

• Producers are still looking for the next Biggie Smalls. And apparently, it's not this guy.

Calling all aspiring film stars! Are you a morbidly obese African American male? Do you habitually smoke cannabis, lip-sync along to "Hypnotize" and occasionally refer to your significant others as "bitches?" Have you banged Lil' Kim?

If so, you might be PERFECT for the role of rapper Biggie Smalls in an upcoming biopic! Auditions are currently open, so send in a video of yourself doing your best "Big Poppa" impression (preferably something that shows you eating or rapping) and let us be the judge!

NOTE: This employer does not *technically* discriminate based on race, sex, gender or musical ability, however thin white people need not apply.

[Village Voice]

Big news for those who are old enough to remember rapper Notorious B.I.G., whose shooting death in '97 remains unsolved, to the delight of Tupac fans. The murder case was reopened in July — but its the wrongful death suit filed last year by Biggie's estate, to the tune of $2 million, that keeps his name in the headlines. And tomorrow, expect more headlines!

On the 9th, the lawyers [for B.I.G.'s family] are planning to depose two new witnesses who could make a slam-dunk case for wrongful death and a cover-up and, some hope, even single out the identity of the shooter in the convoluted ten-year-old case.

The most likely suspect to be named? John Mark Karr, of course.

• Tom Jones is the next in a line of rockers to get knighted. Will this bizarre trend ever end? [MSNBC]

• Over 3,000 cases of Nelly's "Pimp Juice" energy drink were stolen on December 22, on a shipment bound for Trinidad. Shortly afterwards, Kevin Federline writes "PopoZao." You make the connection. [All Hip Hop]

• You know Mariah Carey beat 50 Cent for number one album, but did you know that Mary J. Blige beat out Notorious B.I.G for best selling Christmas album? We're sticking to our 'holiday spirit" theory. [E! News]

• Bono admits to fearing he'd be thrown out of U2 for his commitment to charity work, because his loyalty is supposed to be to the band. And band managers don't like to see their money go to charity groups. (Unless, of course, it creates publicity.) [AP News]