• Random British exhibitionist Gemma Atkinson's steals Britney's coveted neckbrace look
• Before she was sentenced to 45 days in prison, Paris Hilton was appreciating life's simple pleasures. Like eating corn on the cob with a total stranger.
• Not even Jennifer Boobs Love Hewitt looks hot just moments after stepping off the plane.
• Jumpin' Joe Francis to possibly rejoin his prison boyfriend only moments after saying goodbye.
• Sting and his wife reportedly fired their personal chef…for getting knocked up. The creator of tantra would never approve!
• Newlyweds skyrocketed Jessica Simpson from C-list to B-list, while Nick Lachey somehow stuck around on the D-list. No worries though, they didn't have a prenup — which means Nick's gonna get a hefty chunk of Simpson's purse. [PerezHilton]
• Speaking of Nick, he's retained publicionado Ken Sunshine to battle Jessica's supra-publicist Rob Shuter in the gossip columns. [Lowdown]
• More Lachey news? Even we are starting to get ill. He's in talks with The WB to star in his own sitcom, where he plays a famous baseball player in a new marriage. How eerily familiar .. we already know how the mid-season cancellation is going to turn out. [Reuters]
• First Jamie Foxx thinks he's the real Ray Charles. Now Lenny Kravitz is about to take on Jimi Hendrix's likeness. [Fox 411]
• In Paris Hilton's world, it's all about leftovers. While she's parading around with Mary-Kate Olsen's ex Stavros Niarchos, her ex-fiance Paris Latsis is new pals with Tara Reid. But it's just platonic, for all our sakes. [Page Six]
• Laguna Beach's Kristin Cavallari is extending her 15 minutes, thanks to co-hosting duties for UPN's new reality show Get This Party Started. Alongside Extra's Ethan Erickson, the career reality TV starlet will repent for her on-screen sins by throwing parties for those in need. [NYDN]
• Michael Jackson still hates the Jews. Now he hates the Italians. But he loves the Muslims. [Page Six & R&M]
• That sound you hear is A-list actresses wailing in agony, because Dolce and Gabbana decided not to design for the Oscars anymore, claiming it's "too conservative." [Extra]
• Paris Latsis is finally speaking after the "engagement is off" announcement surfaced, saying Paris Hilton was ""the most incredible woman I have ever met in my life." That's sweet, and we're sure she feels the same.
• Now that they're supposedly pregnant, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes' "arguing" over wedding locations suddenly seems relevant. As do publicists.
• Former Door's drummer John Densmore put the kabash on any plans to use the song "Light My Fire" in a deodorant commercial and continues to say no to the likes of Cadillac and Apple.
• Eminem doesn't want your cell blazing with his music unless he's the one who sold it to you.
• Jason Alexander, who just hasn't taken the hint that Seinfeld is as far as he's getting, found out about the cancellation of his Listen Up sitcom by reading it in USA Today.
As we interrupted our weekend to tell you, the five-month engagement between Paris Hilton and Paris Latsis has come to an abrupt end.
Oh, who are we kidding? Even the rarely cognisant Anna Nicole Smith probably saw this coming for weeks, if not months. But like a PR smarty, Hilton's camp released the news on Friday evening, which meant you spent the weekend enjoying the July-like weather instead of worrying whether she'll return that 24-carat rock.
Yeah, seriously, is she going to return it? Even Latsis' billionaire family isn't that generous, since kiddo Paris' net worth is rivaled by Tinkerbell's weekday jewelry.
• The publisher Free Pages is working hard to get its book Everything I Know About Men I Learnt From My Dog billed as "controversial" for claiming men are just like dogs. And women are just like pussies.
• Anderson Cooper blames his early grey hair on trying to become a nelly bottom, otherwise known as a coxswain.
• Tara Reid assures us that her hooters are finally under control. Having now discovered the miracle of double stick tape, she claims Playboy has offered her millions to show the world what we already have.
• It's Marry Your Baby Daddy Day in Fort Greene, with unwed parents tying the knot in a special ceremony sure to create stable environments for their children.
• Paris Latsis' parents aren't the only ones glad his relationship with Paris Hilton is waning. Their heiress' own parents were overheard dissing her fiance because he doesn't work and has no "motivation." Unlike Ms. Hilton, we're sure.
• Hilary Duff rang in her 18th birthday yesterday with a bash in Hollywood and, surprise, Lindsay Lohan doesn't appear in any of the celebratory photos.
• If the fashion industry really is the official breeding ground for drug use, we're going to be spending the night searching for a new superlative for the media biz.
• Fernando Ferrer is taking responsibility for a fib on his campaign site's blog, which claimed he went to public schools as a kid. In fact, he went to private Catholic schools. It took just a few moments for Bloomberg's camp (and both the NYP and NYDN) to latch on to the "mistake."
• Need a Christmas gift for that special someone? Elton John is available to play a private concert for you and 500 guests for the bargain price at $1.5 million, only at Neiman Marcus.
• Paris Hilton and perhaps ex-fiance Paris Latsis were seen spending some time together, but by all accounts it wasn't the "quality" type.
• Wisteria Lane may be getting more crowded. Courtney Cox is reportedly in negotiations to play a mental institution escapee in a future episode of Desperate Housewives.
• DMX may be joining Lil' Kim on a trip to the clink sometime soon. The rapper failed to show up for a court appearance yesterday for allegedly driving with a suspended license, claiming he had food poisoning. The Judge has given him till next Monday to show up.
• Now you can let a middleman deal with Star and Us Weekly as you try and sell your Paris Hilton camera phone snap.
• Jennifer Garner inadvertently spilled the sex of the littlest Affleck to Jay Leno last night. While telling Jay about her expanding size, Garner used the word "she" before rushing to cover her mouth in a classic "oops" moment. One thing we do know for sure: She's either having a boy or a girl.
• We wouldn't recommend using meth to get yourself out of a hostage situation, but only because we hear heroin works better.
• Who has the keys to Lenny Kravitz' heart? Alicia Keys, that's who. Despite being seated with a group at Mr. Chow's, it was obvious Kravitz wanted to devour Keys instead of the Moo Shoo Pork.
• Taking a hint from that great international traveler Wacko Jacko, hitting the watermarks of Dubai are none other than Brangelina and the kids! This comes fresh off a trip to an Edmonton mall, where Maddox was calling Pitt "daddy."
• Christina Aguilera is going into overdrive to make you believe she's thrilled about the arrival of Britney and K-Fed's new spawn. After gushing to ad nauseum (heavy on the nausea) about her joy for the new tot, she mentioned she's sent the trailer trash threesome a baby gift. A Cheetos gift bag, oh my!
• Missing: Lindsay Lohan's boobs. The starlet claims the main reason she's gaining weight is that she misses her breasts. (Anyone asked Tyra Banks if she's seen 'em?)
• Lil' Kim might have admitted to breaking the law, but that's not stopping her from appropriating herself as a victim of the government's gangsta rap crack down.
• The wedding between Paris Hilton and Paris Latsis is off, and has been for months. But you already knew that, right?
Hey you guyyyyys! All those rumors about Paris Hilton ditching fiance Paris Latsis to shack up with her record producer Scott Storch can't be true — even if we did see them together the other night.
And why can't these insinuations be true? Well, because "supermodel socialite" Cory "The Model" Bernstein said so. On his website, even!
I've been telling you guyz Scott Storch is ONLY Paris' friend and record producer. She is very happily still engaged to Mr. Paris , Paris Latsis and her wedding is NOT on hold, contrary to what the news and tabloids have and will be reporting…Paris and Paris are in love and happy and Are planning on being married with 2 weddings that I was told about and told you here, months ago.
Two weddings, did you hear that? So stop hating, even if you usually do believe everything Richard Johnson & Co. spew.
• If Paris Hilton hand-holds with a man other than her fiance Paris Latsis, does it make a headline? Fortunately that question needn't be answered, since everyone saw Hilton hand-in-hand with her music producer Scott Storch at the MTV VMAs.
• She may have remained calmer than usual at the VMAs, but on her flight back to New York, prison-bound Lil Kim nearly got booted off the plane after arguing with flight attendants over a first-class "mix-up." Though she's gotta stir some shit up before her stay in the clink.
• Lindsay Lohan got reigned in by mama Dina, who forced her skinny offspring to stay put until the storm passed before getting on a plane for the VMAs.
• Brad Pitt and George Clooney's Las Vegas hotel gimmick, which has been talked about for years, continues to make the gossip rounds. Now they've picked up Rande Gerber of Whiskey lounge fame — and they might finally start construction in January. That doesn't mean it's January '06, however.
• Teen People is covering new ground: strip clubs. At least that's what Chad Michael Murray chose to chat about, re: his adult outing that wife and co-star Sophia Bush supposedly knew about.
• Jenny McCarthy's divorce from John Asher isn't just affecting her personal life, but also her business decisions. The light-hearted jokes in her tying the knot manual Marriage Laughs, which just got picked up for $1 million, don't sound so funny anymore.
• Director Oliver Stone pleaded no contest to misdemeanor charges of marijuana possession, which follows his 1999 guilty plea for the same thing.
• There's a snag in the wedding plans for Paris Hilton and Paris Latsis. They won't make their promised nuptials of 2005, instead moving the ceremony to at least 2006.
• Court TV continues its city-wide ad campaign by blanketing the side of an apartment building on Sixth Avenue with images of murder. How pleasant for passers-by.
• Martha Stewart's on the ballot for October's American Magazine Conference, where her prison tales are expected to make cameos during her speech.
• Rupert Murdoch's wad of cash continues to fatten, but no thanks to the New York Post.
