We're hearing that Rita Cosby, who was removed from MSNBC show after months and months of not being removed from her MSNBC show, has signed with Inside Edition to play the role of special correspondent. We did not try to confirm this information because we want to see if this post will get Rita to whisper sweet nothings, or sweet confirmation or denial, into our telephone.

What crossed my mind…they knew I was walking into a big book party. It just shows you that with these guys it's all just smoke and mirrors. It's all PR and spin. And that's what I write about in my book. So I'm not surprised that they used this opportunity. This is par for the course for these characters

–Rita Cosby, explaining what "crossed her mind" when she was served with a subpoena Wednesday night (at the behest of Howard K. Stern) immediately upon walking into the party for her new book, "Blonde Ambition: The Untold Story Behind Anna Nicole Smith's Death."

Earlier:
• Opportunistic Lawyer Sues Opportunistic Author
• Stern's Gay Lawsuit Fury [Queerty]

Howard K. Stern slaps Rita Cosby with a $60 million over allegations in her new book accusing Stern of climbing into bed (both literally and metaphorically) with Anna Nicole Smith's baby daddy, Larry Birkhead. When reached for comment, the always litigious Larry Birkhead exclaimed, "Damn! I can't believe that son of a bitch beat me to it! Guess we all know which bastard's getting an ass-fucking later on tonight." [Queerty]

Rita Cosby will not be appearing on the Today show today, tomorrow or anytime soon if Larry Birkhead's lawyers have anything to say about it.

According to TMZ, Today producers abruptly canceled a scheduled sit-down with the former NBC correspondent (and author of trashy publicity-seeking bio, "Blonde Ambition: The Untold Story Behind Anna Nicole Smith’s Death") after receiving a rather threatening letter from the litigious Larry Birkhead and his newest crop of high-paid high-powered attorneys.

Birkhead, as we reported previously, has threatened to sue Cosby for smearing his *cough* good name with somewhat-believable allegations that he and Howard K. Stern were in collusion throughout the custody hearings and somewhat-less-believable allegations that he and Stern were in a "relationship." At least according to Jackie Hatten, a reliable source "known wacko whose brother served prison time for stalking Anna Nicole."

CONTINUED »

When asked about Rita Cosby's allegations that he and Howard K. Stern had some sort of "backroom deal" during the Anna Nicole Smith custody hearings, Larry Birkhead replied, "None of it is true…The bottom line is Rita Cosby needed something to do. She got fired [from MSNBC in 2006], and nobody wanted her."*

Fortunately, Stern is certainly no stranger to courtroom drama. In addition to allegedly colluding with Howard K. Stern in the custody fight for Dannielynn, Birkhead has already announced plans to sue his former (and allegedly unpaid) attorney Debra Opri.

Surprisingly, however, Birkhead appears to be having some difficulty finding/retaining new counsel.

*The man does have a point

The embargoed Anna Nicole Smith book Blonde Ambition, from sometime MSNBC personality Rita Cosby, has made its way to Amazon.com, with a ranking of 92,186. Get your pre-orders in now!

(Perhaps you heard? Rita LOVES her some ANS.)

Last month, Hachette had pulled its own listing of the book, but it now appears to be back online in an abbreviated version. Which means come Sept. 4, you'll get to relive the Anna Nicole saga one cable news show plug at a time.

Former Fox News and "current" MSNBC host stops singing karaoke for a minute to pen tell-all book proposal.

Bless her heart. But at last, an explanation for that Mexican holiday.

(Photo via James Edstrom)

Yesterday, Rita Cosby went on Sirius radio** to address those rumors that she was forced out at MSNBC (turns out the decision was mutual!) and discusses the "plethora of things" she's contemplating as her next potential gig (teaching, TV shows, radio shows, and more!) And, in between enlightening us as to the real reason behind her departure, Rita opened up about her one-of-a-kind journalistic approach.

I didn't want to do what sort of everybody else is doing. I want to do roll-up-my-sleeves, get out there, go to these places, go get the guests.

Which, incidentally, is exactly the sort of ingenuity Rita demonstrated by crashing Anna Nicole Smith's funeral.

CONTINUED »

• Courtney Love is accused of not paying for her latest rehab stay. Meanwhile, Love is counterclaiming that you shouldn't have to pay if you come out just as batshit insane as when you went in.

• Rita Cosby really is leaving! Officially, it's to "pursue other interests," which is just publicist speak for, "panicking until she finds her next job."

• Eva Longoria and Tony Parker never go to bed angry. Even if he has a really, really big game the next day.

• Daylight savings is the new Y2K!

• Nicole Kidman to make a cameo on Nip/Tuck next season; preferably as another one of Christian's crazy model/actress conquests.

• The NYT has two good reasons for you not to see 300: (a) It's about as violent as Apocalypto and (b) it's "twice as stupid."

Back in December, we reported that famous disappearing act Rita Cosby (and Tucker Carlson) would be the next to go from MSNBC, as GE handed down the cost-cutting measures and ratings determined who at the network could actually be considered an asset. Today, Page Six confirms the mounting murmurs:

RITA Cosby sounds less raspy following recent vocal-cord surgery, but MSNBC is still going to drop her when her contract expires on April 1. The cable network had no comment, but insiders insist the host, who has been diligently covering the Anna Nicole Smith story, is out. Cosby has been presenting daytime specials since MSNBC canceled her prime-time show, "Live & Direct," last summer.

Meanwhile, we hear at least one, if not two, Web news outlets are said to be eyeing Cosby as a possible contributor for ramped up broadband video news components. Thus far, we don't believe they've yet reached out to Cosby.

But if Daryn Kagan can do it, why not Rita? Oh, right.

As we do our best to avoid All Things Anna Nicole, one peculiar incident has perked our interest. It's no secret that Entertainment Tonight and The Insider have beaten this story to, ahem, death, but MSNBC's Rita Cosby has also been on the beat. And perhaps she's been going at it a little too hard.

A report from ETonline.com about the private gathering at the Villa Florentine after Anna's funeral – where ET cameras were the only ones allowed inside! – called out Cosby for being booted from the affair because she wasn't on Howard K. Stern’s guest list (as ICN fills in). The quote from the article is:

At one point in the reception, MSNBC's RITA COSBY — a guest of Virgie's — allegedly snuck into the affair, but was quickly escorted out.

Except you'd be hard pressed to find that quote again — as it's been removed from the story. The only way we happened upon it was via ETonline.com's search feature.

Looks like there was one hurried call from one pissed off MSNBC publicist.

Some might argue that the only noticeable thing about Rita Cosby – beside her absence from MSNBC's airwaves of late – is her voice. Deep. Raspy. The type you call a 976 number for but would never admit to it.

And now, after years perfecting her trademark – which falls into the same category as Nancy Grace's "caring," except only of of the two is authentic – it is, all of a sudden, gone.

Since Cosby appeared on the air last week - after a three week "enforced" vacation in Mexico - her trademark rasp was gone and she was speaking in an unremarkable tone of voice.

Cosby declined to say what exactly she'd done to get her voice back.

But she did say that she had been to a see a doctor before her three weeks off the radar. [...]

"I am getting so many compliments about my voice, I intend to keep it this way. . . Thanks for noticing how energetic my voice sounds."

Though it might be hard not to "keep it this way," if those rumors about her Mexican surgery are to be believed. Either way, glad to have you back, Rita. It's been hard ruminating on your axing without you around to prove you're still allowed inside the building.

So, Rita Cosby is just making stuff up now? She's not as bad as Nancy Grace, perhaps, and we're not even talking about Rita's on-air news reporting. Over at HuffPo, writer and former Newsweek staffer Bill Barol found the kind of time we usually have to pour over an anchor's online bio. And Barol, god bless him, stopped short of believing everything he read.

While reading through the official MSNBC bio on cable oddity Rita Cosby today — I'm not saying I wasn't trying to avoid work — I came across this nugget:

A first-generation American and daughter of a Polish POW, in 2006 she was awarded the Ellis Island Medal of Honor, America's third-highest medal.

A little digging (see above re: work) reveals that the Ellis Island Medal of Honor is awarded some 637 times annually by something called the National Ethnic Coalition of Organizations, or NECO, and that among its recent recipients are Susan Lucci, Peter Max, both Johnny Bench and Yogi Berra, and such plucky, bootstrapping, up-from-poverty success stories as Angier Biddle Duke. [...]

All I'm saying is, would it be too much to expect a major newsgathering organization — or, in this case, MSNBC — to scan its own web site for insupportable claims? I know nobody reads the correspondents' bios except people looking to kill time on what should otherwise have been a productive Monday, and I understand that resume-padding is something you do to help secure your next job, which Cosby may be needing in pretty short order, if you believe what you see on the Interwebs.

Forget that Barol might've just contradicted our assumption that he didn't believe everything he read, but who hasn't embellished a little bit to make themselves sound more worthwhile and that six-figure education amount to something? Just 10 minutes ago we told a reporter we were in a committed relationship with Tinsley Mortimer and had been been voted "Sexiest Eyes" by our graduating class, but certainly their fact checkers will find out that neither are true. (Tinz ignores us; "Sexiest Eyes" went to some asshole.)

Exclusive

As Jeff Zucker weighs his options in restructuring NBC's Burbank operations, we hear MSNBC head Dan Abrams is readying the chopping block.

An insider tattles to us that there have been "lots of closed door meetings" regarding newlywed Alison Stewart's 3pm show The Most, which debuted in May. Obviously execs don't appreciate its worldly mix of news and entertainment: We're told to expect to see it cut next.

Meanwhile, a timeline is arising for the futures of Rita Cosby and Tucker Carlson. We already told you that Rita – who lost her own primetime show Live & Direct – was getting the ax. Her exit from the building, we hear, is imminent. And as for Carlson, whose Tucker has been hanging in there with a downsized staff? A February cancelation announcement is scheduled, says our source. All of this on top of the impending series of layoffs expected at the news channel under NBC 2.0.

All of which, meanwhile, makes congratulatory staff memo sent out this week by Dan Abrams – where he lauds staffers for boosting ratings – an invitation to call him an ass. And make toupee jokes.

That Tucker Carlson is always interested in a good sex tape – and will tell you on air – is no longer a surprise to Intern Wendy. That he and Rita Cosby are willing to read press releases from David Blaine's PR machine still is.

• "There goes that wine and cheese viewing party I was having for my neighborhood." Tucker Carlson, bummed that there's no Britney Spears/Kevin Federline sex tape after all, Tucker, November 22

• "It's a Third World, after all, it's a Third World, after all…" Robin Williams, singing Disney World's theme song if it were hit by Hurricane Katrina, Anderson Cooper 360, November 17

• "Rita Cosby, will she be in a cage?" Tucker Carlson, on the only way he'll watch Rita Cosby, Tucker, November 21

• "Do you go to the bathroom?" Rita Cosby, asking David Blaine the only interesting question about his gyroscope stunt, Scarborough Country, November 21

• "I was just in Afghanistan and I brought back a Burka and I gave it to my mom." Anderson Cooper, bringing mommy Gloria Vanderbilt a special gift, Anderson Cooper 360, November 17

Exclusive

What, you thought the fun was over? Nope! As part of "NBC 2.0" (read: staff slashing), we're hearing MSNBC talking head Tucker Carlson is out the door in what's perhaps one of the biggest, though least surprising, shifts by the network. Meanwhile, FTVLive is reporting that Rita Cosby, who's already taken a backseat role after being removed from her primetime talking head gig, will also be without a home. Keith Olbermann and Chris Matthews, we hear, will hang on to their seven-figure deals.

Update: While Eat The Press checks in with MSNBC chief Dan Abrams – who issues a requisite denial: "We have made no decisions about any possible programming changes" – we're also told that even Rita's production team isn't aware of the axing. Likely Abrams will want to deliver the news to Secaucus before the likes of us, huh?

Update 2: We're quite willing to let the other gossips do our legwork, as happens with scoop thief Radar pinging Tucker Carlson for comment. Says Tuck: "It's bullshit. It's total bullshit. I talked to Abrams last night. I've got another year on my contract. That's my comment: Bullshit." And while we're willing to believe Abrams and Tucker did have a chat last night regarding his tenure, and that Tucker throws around "bullshit" like George Allen does "macaca," our source at NBC (who's privy to chatter above MSNBC's decision makers) says otherwise: "Zucker can't stand him. He wants to see him go. [From what I understand] Zucker has been more than hinting to Abrams that Tucker and Rita need to go."

Oh, Rita. Some interviews – no matter how hard you press your face up against the glass – just aren't meant to be.

Looking into the eyes of John Mark Karr [rita.msnbc.com]

Today may be the funniest Cable Quotables round-up we've had in a while. Glenn Back creaming himself over cookies, Rita Cosby's guests attacking her for once, and Nancy Grace with more "take your pants off" talk. Intern Wendy must have had a fun week. Grab a glass of milk, and get ready to pop these quotes in your mouth. You know they just scream "read me, read me!"

• “Glenn, Glenn? I am so tasty, thick layer of yummy fudge, two delicious cookies. Sure, it looks like you`re biting the head off a cute little midget that lives in a tree, but it`s OK. I don`t feel pain. Buy me, Glenn. Buy me!” —Glenn Beck, dirty talking with the Keebler elf, Glenn Beck, August 8

• “I also demanded and I got Anderson Cooper‘s manicurist. We also got his dermatology technician to apply my bi-daily facials. And last but not least, John Gibson‘s personal hairstylist.” —Joe Scarborough, not such an average Joe at heart, Scarborough Country, August 8

• “Are you on crack?” —Shannon Tweed, analyzing Rita Cosby’s interviewing skills, Scarborough Country, August 9

• “Now, when Rosie (Nancy Grace’s producer) shows up at work with an AR-15, it will be wrong, but I don‘t think anybody will be surprised.” —Tucker Carlson, predicting that Nancy Grace will be a corpse on her own show, Tucker, August 9

• “I'm going to make a confession. I don't think I'm nuts. That's exactly what people think when they're nuts. People who are nuts never think they're nuts, which to me is proof positive I'm not insane.” —Glenn Beck, proving he’s crazy, Glenn Beck, August 9

• “Did he have on pants?” —Nancy Grace, praying for a naked ass corpse, Nancy Grace, August 10

Intern Wendy has a treat for you! She's pulled all the hilarious quote that have been uttered since Friday and brought them to the table for you to chew on. Radio sex? George Michael's lover? Old Sparky the electric chair. Oh, yeah … it's all here. Yumm.

• “Now, you guys, if I want to buy a bike for myself or for Joe Scarborough, anybody here, how much would it be? For me, it would be free, right?” —Rita Cosby, trying to score freebies from the American Chopper guys, Scarborough Country, July 27

• “Described by British tabloids as a pot-bellied, jobless van driver, there he is, Norman Kirkland. You can see how hard it would be to resist Norm especially under the intoxicating moonlight. Plus come on, the guy‘s got a van.” —Brian Unger, on the attributes of George Michael’s sex partner, Countdown, July 28

• “I'd like to introduce you to someone. He`s got the street name ‘Old Sparky.’ That`s the Georgia electric chair. It`s recently been painted—repainted white.” —Nancy Grace, getting high off the paint fumes from Old Sparky the electric chair, Nancy Grace, July 28

• “Well, I would not deny you the stupid, if that`s what you choose to be.” —Rev. Al Sharpton, giving Glenn Beck permission to be an idiot, Glenn Beck, July 28

• “Let's talk for a moment about sex radio, because, you know, from what I`ve understood it really isn't sex radio. I mean isn't sex like pictures? Don't you really need to see what's going on to make this happen?” —Bill Handel, Glenn Beck, July 31