SUPER FEEDBACK LOOP Super Bowl advertisers are more than happy to show reporters their multi-million dollar 30-second spots. So long as they sign confidentiality agreements and agree to the terms of their press embargoes. Which allows the press to report on marketers creating clever spots, drumming up just enough publicity about the whole charade without spoiling the reason for viewers to tune in, and then replay the spots on YouTube.
THE PEPSI ADS WILL BE BETTER ANYWAY Fox won't be selling ad space to presidential candidates during the Super Bowl. The biggest advertising event of the year is essentially sold out, and Fox doesn't have enough slots to offer equal time to the candidates. Fine, more quick-witted promotions of bad beer for the rest of us. [TVWeek]
What the hell is this thing? Hint: It's not a prop from Cloverfield. CONTINUED »
JUST BECAUSE IT MIGHT COME UP AT YOUR NEXT DINNER PARTY The Giants are going to the Super Bowl. [NYT]
Back in January, when Anheuser-Busch announced the Super Bowl-timed launch of Bud.TV – which their publicist would love for you to continue referencing as a 24/7 content network of "Webisodes, celebrity interviews, comedy, short films and consumer-generated content, even sports events" – our first and only point on the matter was that the site's web verification system was too complex for most legal aged semi-computer savvy types to figure out. A-B enlisted the help of a database company to cross reference first and last names, birth dates, and zip codes to make sure visitors were actually of age.
Now the attorneys general of 21 states are lashing out at Bud.TV, calling the process too easy for minors to figure out. Reports AdAge:
The letter [from the attorneys general] said A-B can do more to keep out youth, noting that its vendor has ways the brewer isn't using of confirming whether Bud.tv registrants are who they say they are. Those include follow-up phone calls or direct mailings and software that checks to make sure the information on a single ID can't be used for multiple users' registrations.
The attorneys general found further fault with Bud.tv functions that allow users to download programs to their iPods and sent via e-mail to their friends. "If the programming on your site can be downloaded and shared freely … what's the purpose of engaging any age verification at all?"
Hell, while they're at it, they should just send Dateline's Chris Hansen to every home trying to log on and verify that they aren't, in fact, mere 16-year-olds bored with CollegeHumor's offerings.
Sunday was the Super Bowl. Us? We threw a party, watched the game commercials on the big screen, and stayed out of the cold. And CBS? They wanted to juice the ratings, get viewers excited even if the game was going to be a wash. So they went all Olympics-style, telling the war stories of NFL players and the struggles of black coaches getting their due. The network bet untold hundreds of millions (billions?) on the Super Bowl, and they weren't about to let their investment flounder.
And then along comes WaPo sports columnist Leonard Shapiro, whose column on Monday had the audacity to suggest a four-hour preshow had room for sad tales and actual news of relevance. "Journalism," we've heard it called.
There was no mention, for example, of the growing number of retired NFL players furious at the league and their own union for what they perceive to be callous indifference to the plight of many of their less fortunate teammates who need better insurance and disability coverage and increased pensions. [...]
Three days before the big game, The N.Y. Times and Boston Globe also broke an important story on the health problems of former Patriots linebacker Ted Johnson. Only 34 and a key man in three Patriots three Super Bowl victories this decade, Johnson was quoted as saying that Patriots coach Bill Belichick forced him to practice against medical advice a few days after he had sustained a concussion in a preseason game, and that he's been dealing with the consequences ever since.
But the real travesty was the lack of in-depth coverage of a major Super Bowl tenant: the commercials. Where were the Stuart Elliot levels of analysis? Alas, laughing at the gay-baiting Snickers commercial will have to suffice.
First Isaiah Washington gets labeled a hate-monger for calling some dude a "fag" and then lying about it, so to appease his public, Washington checks himself into a rehab center to treat his "anti-gayness" gene.
Then last week, Paris Hilton offends everyone (and surprises/disappoints approximately no one) when it turns out that she hates black people and "little jappy jews" almost as much as we all hate her.
And now, Snickers is in trouble for that hate-mongering commercial that aired during the Super Bowl.
You know, that one where two mechanics share a Snickers bar ("Lady and the Tramp" style), and are so horrified by the ensuing almost-kiss that they start pulling out fistfuls of chest hair in a deluded attempt to prove their manliness?
Yeah, that one.
Anyways, suddenly, GLADD is chastising Snickers, Mars and the NFL for endorsing prejudice, the Colts and Bears spokesmen (who were contacted why, exactly?) are mumbling incoherent outdated phrases like "we are aware of the brouhaha" and "no comment," and the NFL is implausibly claiming they were "too focused on the Big Game" to pre-screen any of the offensive ad campaigns.
Meanwhile the Super Bowl ad controversy doesn't end there, as viewers (apparently unfamiliar with television and the whole "suspended reality" concept) are still reeling from a GM spot in which a depressed robot (i.e. you, the viewer!) momentarily daydreams about jumping off a bridge.
Could it be that the New York Times was right all along when they argued that the cartoonish violence of the Super Bowl commercials was likely a reflection of the toll of the United States' war in Iraq?
We think not. So we've decided to weigh in and say, once and for all, what we think is—and isn't—offensive.
CONTINUED »
• The Portland Press Herald apologizes for accidentally threatening to destroy the entire Jewish race.
• Jeff Zucker to spin around in his desk chair while his three new senior deputies deal with "that whole YouTube thing."
• NYT has one more chance to talk about the Iraq-inspired "cartoonish violence" of this year's Super Bowl ads.
• Atoosa Rubenstein is negligibly closer to unveiling homemade films about her cat on LSD.
• In the wake of Money Honeygate, AdAge reflects on the valuable lessons we've learned about travel demands and merchandising.
• A videographer and "alleged journalist" continues to stay behind bars for no apparent reason.
Like any sports fan, we tuned in to last night's Super Bowl for one reason only: Prince. And like any music fan, we immediately thought of the New York Times' Kelefa Sanneh when we wanted to know how others looked at his "Purple Rain" meets the Foo Fighters halftime show.
His performance last night at Super Bowl XLI will surely go down as one of the most thrilling halftime shows ever; certainly the most unpredictable, and perhaps the best.
Or, as it will otherwise be known: The tamest and lamest Prince performance. Ever.
Did you see his face during the first verse of “Purple Rain,” when he tossed his bandana into the crowd? He looked as if he were getting away with something.
Yeah. Excess moisture.
• NYT to LAT: We weren't actively trying to insult you—we were just saying nice things about our newspaper that happened to expose the shortcomings of yours.
• American Idol epitomizes the unpleasant side-effects that accompany living in a democracy.
• Magazines in heated competition to see who can throw the best post-Super Bowl cokefest.
• Folio Magazine reports a 400% increase in magazines targeting people "much, much richer" than you.
• Summary of this year's Mag Lifetime Achievement Awards: Liz Smith tried, failed, to bang Lewis Lapham; Rachael Ray "loves" spaghetti, still hates black people.
• Billionaire accuses Sahara author of "duping him" on film rights; rest of world accuses Sahara author of writing a book that makes no fucking sense.
The Super Bowl commercials are coming! The Super Bowl commercials are coming! Oh, and, um, a bunch of guys will be intermittently tossing around a football and beating the living crap out of one another.
But natch, the ads are our all-time favorite part. From the annoying Budweiser frogs to the little boy trapped in a Pepsi bottle, Super Bowl adds are (as Malcolm Gladwell might say) "stickier" than that piece of warm chewing gum we just sat in.
So here's the fateful FedEx ad designed to show both amateurs—and professionals—how it's done.
After spending millions on Super Bowl advertising, Budweiser wants to make sure it generates some ROI on its clever spots. Enter Bud.TV, a "DVD-quality" streaming video site that TV viewers will be directed to for "24/7" content, like "Webisodes, celebrity interviews, comedy, short films and consumer-generated content, even sports events."
But in order not to offend advocacy groups like MADD – and we're sure PETA will pick a fight, just 'cause – Budweiser owner Anheuser-Busch is implementing a nifty new age-verification system to make sure its visitors are of the 21-and-over variety.
A-B has reached a deal with Aristotle Inc., a Washington company that provides age-verification services in areas such as tobacco marketing and film ratings. Bud.TV visitors will need to provide their first and last name, date of birth and ZIP code—fairly standard procedure for access to Web sites.
But Aristotle will then conduct a real-time verification check, via a search of public databases, to ensure that the users are of legal drinking age. Users who are "cleared" can then create a password for easy entry going forward.
Or, when that system fails and visitors can't access the site, they'll resort to a simplified verification system, like asking you to type in your birthdate into an entry field. You know, like they currently do.
CBS has finally figured out how to get Katie Couric some ratings. No, they're not going to dress her up in a French maid's outfit while Bob Schieffer anchors the broadcast. They're going to put her in front of the tens of millions of people who are going to be watching the Super Bowl. Bam! Insta-audience!
The "CBS Evening News" anchor will contribute a feature to CBS' four-hour Super Bowl pregame show on Feb. 4, the network said on Thursday.
She will also anchor the evening news from Miami, the site of the big game, on the Friday before the game. [...]
She's tentatively scheduled to do a feature on Pittsburgh Steelers wide receiver Hines Ward and his Korean heritage.
She'll then join Prince on stage for the halftime show to play one of his fly girls during "Kiss."
And ratings, as they always do with Katie, will, of course, slide.
• ABC dominates at the Golden Globes; Best "Globes" reference of the night still goes to Sascha Baron Cohen.
• How many reporters does it take to write one article about Britney Spears? Seven, apparently…with six of them to be fired by Time Inc.
• Alright, we get it. All of you just want to make sweet, sweet love to your newspaper. Jeez, get a room.
• 24 to be available on DVD less than 24 hours after Jack Bauer makes your heart go guh-gung.
• Britney Spears "crotch-flashes her way" out of Super Bowl promo; listen closely, and you can actually hear Janet Jackson cackling, (in between stuffing her face with doughnuts).
• The LAT has trouble remembering whether The Governator is a U.S. citizen.
• A journalism prof worries j-school teaches students to give "patronizing" news coverage…then takes a snotty, elitist tone regarding the "home-and-garden section."
• Eva Longoria WON'T do on-camera sex scenes, although she WILL do rampant, off-camera promiscuity
• Pete Doherty cheats on Kate Moss with a German groupie and a giant bag of cocaine.
• And the giant softies over at Time Inc. have already begun the mass exodus…
• Guy to propose to his girlfriend in a commercial airing during the Superbowl; girl to run to bathroom for an "emergency #2" and miss the entire thing.
• Help us say goodbye to our gossip girl Molly, who departs MollyGood today after countless months of crotch shots, nip slips, and obsessing over Rachel Bilson. Some fella named Cord will be taking over on Monday, which means a fresh take on making fun of K-Fed!
How to introduce your article about the annual buzz surrounding the coming onslaught of Super Bowl ads? Apparently, there's only one way.
From today's USA Today:
Now that the National Football League's regular season has ended, the countdown to Super Bowl XLI has begun. While sports fans are focused on which teams will make it to the Feb. 4 game, folks in the advertising business are watching to see which marketers suit up for the CBS broadcast.
From today's CNNMoney:
The National Football League playoffs begin this weekend and Super Bowl XLI is only about a month away.
But while sports junkies argue about which teams will wind up playing in the big game in Miami on February 4, many business people and casual fans are more concerned about the advertising frenzy associated with the Super Bowl — i.e. which companies will have commercials airing during the game and how much are they paying to do so.
From the coming weeks of incessant coverage by every media outlet: more of this crap.
• Jay-Z is planning yet another Fade From Black, this time produced by Dr. Dre. Needless to say, it's causing a few ruffled feathers over at Def Jam, so, everyone watch your back on the video shoot. [Page Six]
• Wayne Coyne of The Flaming Lips trashes pop stars who sing about life experiences they've never actually had. All good — until he talks about Beyonce getting a bikini wax. [FMBQ]
• Need a new conversation piece in your apartment? Check out this one of a kind Johnny Cash portrait. We don't love it, but, that's probably because it's not Joaquin Phoenix enough. [EBay]
• Eminem's posse tried to beat up Tommy Lee for talkin' trash about Kid Rock. So, maybe we should just keep all the aging rockers out of Detroit. [Page Six]
• Neil Young switches tunes from singing about heroin use to releasing a "family film." And then, Courtney Love will open a daycare center. [Reuters]
Shocking — we had no idea that girl on girl on girl shower action would be such an attraction on the most testosterone infused day of the year.
ABC's Grey's Pulls Big Post-Super Bowl Stats [Media Week, John Consoli]
Know which Super Bowl ad we really responded to?
The one where MasterCard calls the ability to charge all of our terrorist-related bomb building equipment "priceless." Just think how much cash back you could get just from buying that tube sock, ball point pen, and fertilizer.
Best Super Bowl Ads [AOL]
(To view this ad, click "4th Quarter," then "Mastercard: Macgyver.")
Oh, the wonder of the Super Bowl ads. We wait in anticipation for the funny frogs and crazy Clydesdales to make us laugh, or simply encourage us to drink more beer. This year, however, the funniest ads were for ABC's upcoming sitcom Sons and Daughters. (When a little girl on TV says "we're going to hell because we're Jews, you can't help but spit out a few flecks of nacho chip.)
There were a few people paying attention to the real (boring) ads this year, though. Stuart Elliott at the New York Times "gives kudos to" the SB ads, which he found "were outnumbered by spots reaching for a higher form of hilarity or trying to tug at the heartstrings." A different tune than Bob Garfield at Ad Age is whistling, as he claims this year's spots mark the end of modern civilization.
As for us, we were too distracted by the thought of Mick Jagger's face sliding off to notice most of the second half commercials, but the Kermit the Frog Ad wasn't so bad. And of course, the my-so-called life in a shampoo bottle made us all want to go hug Nicole Richie and give her some Dove soap.
That Burger King ad pretty much freaked everybody out, as did the Gillette Five Blade razor, simply because it seems like shaving your face with a lawnmower might be safer. In the end, ABC's ads for its own shows were the definite winners.
Shaquille O'Neal turning over his shoulder, one tear streaming down his face, going "I can't believe Gabby lost her baby," was so much more hilarious than that stupid streaking sheep.
BOB GARFIELD REVIEWS THE SUPER BOWL ADS [Bob Garfield, Ad Age]
Lifting Super Bowl Ads Above the Lowbrow Level [Stuart Elliott, New York Times]
