Plenty of celebrities have their "thing" when it comes to appearing on (on in) magazines. Marc Jacobs' thing, for instance, is getting photographed without many clothes on. Blake Lively's thing is appearing with her hair in disarray. Rapper The Game's thing? Posing like he's going to kill himself.

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It would take the most naive of hip hop listeners to believe every word that comes out of a rapper’s mouth. Exaggeration is one of the elements of their craft. But it’s always amusing to see an rapper’s past directly contradict some part of a his lyrical persona. Take Dr. Dre, for instance. You might not have known that before he adopted an austere wardrobe and a permanent scowl for N.W.A., he was a member of the glittery World Class Wrecking Cru. After the jump, check out a few rappers who know what happens when an icky thing called “reality” encroaches upon their music personas.

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• Brandy hires a "crisis management specialist" to help her deal with all the negative publicity that comes with killing somebody and pretending everything is fine.

• According to Gatecrasher, a certain anonymous, morbidly obese oil heir has a bit of a Napoleon complex.

• The Game denies impersonating a police offer and ordering a livery cab driver to run a red ligh; admits being too cheap to simply "slip the guy a $100."

• Sienna Miller's rep denies reports that the Factory Girl sex scenes (with Hayden Christensen) weren't simulated, eliciting snickers by explaining "she's just a really good actress." Seriously.

• Jessica Biel isn't some cheap $10 hooker; she rents out at a nightly rate of $1950.

• Kristin Davis (Charlotte, on Sex and the City) is unnervingly emotional about horses. Related: Real-life Harry Potter wishes he'd trademarked the whole humans-with-a-crazy-horse-fetish thing.

• Liz Hurley forgets to invite BFF (and ex-boyfriend) Hugh Grant to her wedding for reasons that have nothing to do with his once cheating on her with a "total prostitute."

• While Hennesey loves to be named dropped in rap lyrics, model Melyssa Ford does not.

• Is Madonna after Malawian baby No. 2? That's the latest rumor, which also has her battling an Australia couple for a one Jessica Kondanani.

• Star Jones has found a new job. And it's on TV! She'll exec produce and host Black America, a new show on TV One that Elisabeth Hasselbeck will never be able to find.

• Paris Hilton would never let puking get in the way of lip synching.

• Jon Bon Jovi forced Beyonce to take the stage with Michael Jackson at the World Music Awards because, like, you know, that whole "he likes little boys" thing.

• Madonna's tour will include a "disco-fied crucifix" and a $10 million Swarovski encrusted ball that'll will descend from the ceiling holding her Madgesty. Subtle, as always. [R&M]

• Check out all the coolest band's secret concerts. You know, just an intimate little show — on their MySpace pages. [Stereogum]

• The Pussycat Dolls dolls, only slightly less plastic, creepy, and annoying than the real live ones. But easier to sleep with. [NYT]

• Eminem has some unclaimed checks that the State of Michigan is holding onto until he picks them up. After divorce number three from Kim, reportedly without a prenup, he may be wanting to get his hands on those. [MSNBC]

• There is a warrant for The Game's arrest in North Carolina, after the rapper missed a court appearance in March. Sometimes the fuzz has to hate both the playa and the game. [MTV]

• Billy Joel would like to clear up some serious misconceptions about his past. Joel is not a Jack Daniels man. Instead, he used to only drink Dewar's White Label scotch. (Need we remind you, we're Ketel One connoisseurs.) [R&M]

• 50 Cent and The Game have been able to put aside their beef to record tracks for the latter's s upcoming album. We can all learn a lesson from this — Israel and Palestine, we're talking to you. [MTV]

• A band named The Right Brothers is campaigning to get their conservative anthem, "Bush Was Right," on TRL. All they need? Scantily clad booty teens in the video. [Stereogum]

• Courtney Love has been using her time in rehab to write songs for an upcoming album. One of the track titles is "How Dirty Girls Get Clean," which we're assuming includes a lot more withdrawal than it does body wash. [NME]

• Ozzy Osbourne mooned the audience at the UK Music Hall of Fame Ceremony concert, hoping to shock the audience (we hear he has a tendency to do that). Unfortunately, there were camera's present. [BrooklynVegan]

• Thanks to Suge Knight's self-shooting at Kanye West's VMA party, The Game is running into trouble himself. He was set to attend the Magic Marketplace fashion convention in Las Vegas to promo his Hurricane sneaker by 310, but organizers forced him to leave fearing Knight might send some goons for retribution, even though he had nothing to do with the incident.

• There certainly wasn't any Madonna-Britney kiss to buoy ratings, but Diddy didn't do much to even maintain last year's VMA ratings. The MTV broadcast slipped 22 percent over last year, averaging just 8 million viewers from 10.3 million.

• As part of his reelection campaign, Mayor Michael Bloomberg is ripping on old friend Rudy Giuliani.

• Al Pacino could use some lessons with the ladies. Instead of making young starlets feel comfortable around him, he's scaring them off with his rude 'tude.

• It doesn't matter if you're black or white — unless you're a Hurriance Katrina looter intercepted by a wire service caption.