• Rose McGowan confuses "Cinema for AIDS" benefit with her "Slutty Mermaids Anonymous" meeting.

• Howard Stern admits to having twice contemplated suicide. Experts say his unequivocally annoying girlfriend, Beth Ostrosky, is to blame.

• Sarah Jessica Parker launches her new affordable clothing line, Bitten. Carrie Bradshaw would never have approved.

• Nicole Richie is surprisingly funny, surprisingly knowledgeable when it comes to the male erogenous zones.

• Matthew McConaughey shirtless, and rolling around in the sand. This time, it's for a movie!

Did you hear the latest on that total heifer, Nicole Richie? Apparently, she suffered another "dehydration thing" on the set of The Simple Life, only weeks after a similar episode earlier this month. Somebody get that girl a Gatorade!

Last time, Richie claimed she simply hadn't found time to eat during filming—which seemed plausible until we remembered she's shooting a reality tv show, not a Harrison Ford movie. This time, producers are claiming she "felt a little woozy and sat down for a moment," although other reports indicate she "had to be taken to her trailer immediately" and "had trouble walking and speaking clearly" at times.

Yep, sounds psychosomatic to us, too.

But for those of you keeping score, the current Fainting Tally For The Month Of March is now Nicole Richie: 2, George Herbert Walker Bush: 1.

Watch out, Nicole! You may be ahead of the former president now, but—like his son—he never was one to back away from a good fight.

Nuclear war? Psha. Just ignore all that clamor. We have peace on Earth today people. Not only are Nicole Richie and Paris Hilton friends again, they are filming the Simple Life together again for season five. We knew there was a PR stunt in here somewhere, we just really didn't think it was going to be quite that obvious.

Because nobody watched season four of Simple Life (the season where they split up and weren't friends no more) producers threatened them with ultimatums until the agreed to "make up."

At the height of their feud during the last "Simple Life" outing, Hilton and Richie filmed their parts separately. Murray was going to put the two on a "deserted island with a bunch of survivalists" for the next season when they agreed to appear side-by-side in the show.

"They reached out to each other in universal disdain for the island concept," he said, "and rekindled their friendship."

Or, maybe producer Jon Murray said "look, nobody watched this lame show when you guys were fighting. It's only funny when you're together slipping in mud and calling little kids bitches." And we know just how badly Paris and Nicole need the money they'll pull in from E!

Hilton, Richie reunite for 'Simple Life' [AP]

• Us Weekly backpaddles from its "Where's Suri?" coverstory and caves to Katie Holmes' assertion that her baby girl is "doing great." Add in reported sightings of Suri with Katie during their Telluride holiday and it's a full-blown Janice Min about-face. [TMZ]

• With Jessica Simpson likely to host the Teen Choice Awards, what's a girl to do when Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo are nominees? [People]

• Finally a fashion juggernaut of a couple splitting, and it's not the Spades. [Page Six]

• Paris and Nicole's feud is good for ratings: E! has ordered up another season of The Simple Life for '07. [E!]

• Foxy Brown misses court date, escapes judge's wrath. [Lowdown]

• Star has a clever way of insinuating Hollywood's starlets got lipo without actually saying as much. [Popbytes]

Just when you thought you'd seen the last of Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie (we kid, that'll take decades) and The Simple Life, the Fox bastard child has found a new home on E!. Beginning next spring, you can watch the feuding twosome reunite – on screen, at least – for a fourth season that will put them to "the matrimonial test."

In the 10 new episodes, the two women will each take turns playing the role of "wife" and running a household. They will be required to perform household tasks such as cooking, cleaning – and taking care of children. According to E!, each family will decide which young heiress is a "keeper."

And now that Paris knows what Wal-Mart is, she'll know just the place to hire staff to care for the household.

The Simple Life Finds a Home [People]
Earlier: Fourth season not so 'Simple' for Paris & Nicole

• A 20-disc set of the entire Sex and the City series? The Upper East Side is going to clear out like it's Yom Kippur. [NYDN]

• CNN prez Jon Klein isn't so happy with the decision to pair Aaron Brown and Anderson Cooper. The duo, who produced enough awkward moments to feed TVNewser for weeks, are ending their relationship — and like most nonsexual marriages, will share custody of primetime. [TVNewser]

• Beyonce might be pregnant, or she might not be. But she's definitely downing that champagne like a glam Courtney Love. [Gatecrasher]

• Back when Martha Stewart was planning her comeback, she thought her Apprentice was going to replace Donald Trump's. Not only that, but there was talk of her firing him on her first show. Funny how things turned out. [AP]

• Who says you need a network to make a show? Tell that to The Simple Life producers, who are rolling ahead with taping season four of Paris and Nicole's catfight even though Fox doesn't have room for it — and nobody's raised their hand just yet. [Reality TV World]

• With such a huge entourage, it's amazing 50 Cent doesn't have a handler to inform him that nude scenes in films don't actually require actors to, uh, be nude. [Gatecrasher]

• It's a sad day when even New Jersey can't save itself from the butt of jokes, especially its own. [NYDN]

Simple Life producers at Fox thought they had a remarkable solution to deal with Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie's in-fighting: film each starlet separately. They had grand plans on turning the fourth season into a wedding prep reality show, tailing Hilton and then fiance Paris Latsis along with Nicole Richie and soon-to-be husband Adam Goldstein.

And then, as you all remember, Paris and Paris were no more — but that didn't play into Fox's decision to cancel it, claim their mouthpieces.

Fox and the studios behind the show said the Hilton-Richie fallout was not a factor in the network's decision and that producers were shopping the series to other networks.

The News Corp.-owned network said that with the success of several new and returning shows this season, and powerhouse talent show "American Idol" expected back on the airwaves early next year, its prime-time schedule had become too crowded.

Luckily NBC doesn't have such a problem, which might explain why producer Jon Murray says he's shopping it around to other networks. So there might be a Paris and Nicole reunion after all, albeit from some clever video editing.

Fox TV network cancels plans for 'Simple Life 4' [Reuters]
There's nothing 'Simple' about it [USA Today]

• Jodie Foster's Flightplan isn't flying well with flight attendants, who claim their portrayal as rude and unhelpful could do a disservice to airplane security if passengers start distrusting them even more. Because we believe their "just some technical difficulties" excuse isn't actually code for "the engines stopped working."

• For the fourth season of The Simple Life, producers are scouting families willing to host Paris and Nicole that have fathers friskier than Jude Law and just as likely to make a pass at the ex-friends.

• After much ballyhooing about, Kate Moss finally checked herself into The Meadows rehab clinic in Arizona, otherwise known as a career requirement to land fashion house contracts.

• David Gest isn't letting a Liza Minelli bitch slap keep him down. He's planning his comeback (from what to what, we still don't know) next month in L.A.

• Michael Jackson's unpaid warehouse bills are haunting him once again, with unanswered messages from brother Jermaine popping up that show Jacko was too busy wooing young boys to return.

• Gwyneth Paltrow is rumored to be pregnant with her second child, Orange.

You love Star for the same reason we love Star: They're always asking the important questions. But this ride on the Star Screaming merry-go-round flips the punctuation on us with a full-on statement!

So tell us, Star, why are Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie together again?

We have a feeling it has to do with your art department's hankering for a simple serif font, because certainly Bonnie Fuller isn't trying to imply Fox picking up the option on their contracts is new news.

Forget that Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie have yet to resolve their differences, because Fox isn't really interested. Actually, don't forget about their feud, because that's going to be the best source of entertainment for their upcoming fourth season of The Simple Life, which we first told you about last month.

Fox Entertainment prez Peter Liguori decided he'd pick up the options on both their contracts for season four, though they haven't yet decided what the premise will be. He's gotta talk with the ladies first.

Asked whether the hotel heiress and the daughter of singer Lionel Richie had reconciled their differences, Liguori said, ”Not to my knowledge.” He said producers would figure out what direction the show would take “when we sit down, come up with a concept and talk to them.”

With security and Puppy Chow on standby.