Will Farrell's "Ron Burgundy" is back. With Tom Brokaw. At Radio City Music Hall. Reliving the good old days of news broadcasting. Enjoying the possibilities Sue Simmons has opened up for us: "I just remember in '89 during the stock market crash, I heard you say, 'The Dow Jones just took a fist up the butthole today.'"

When MTV invited us along to their annual publicity vehicle known at the Movie Awards, we had dreams of getting squished in with the tabloids and television cameras on the red carpet. And like Pete Doherty to handcuffs, it came together exactly as expected. We were herded onto the Sony lot along with a hundred or so other press outlets on Saturday, awaiting Jessica Simpson's ample calves and Steve Carrell's freshly waxed chest.

While we stuck around to catch host Jessica Alba supervise the popcorn distribution, most of the fun took place among the troops.

This is MTV's holding pen, where the press corp took turns lining up in single file to be hauled off to the red carpet. The most exciting part? Free Snickers.

The Viewing Room, where press not invited inside the show were welcome to watch the live feed. At the end of the day, we realized these folks were the lucky ones.

This is where the press peed while waiting to get into single file.

After the jump, we promise real celebrities. And no pee.

CONTINUED »

• There's a reason Britney Spears needs hair extensions (or whatever that stupid hat is). She's going bald y'all. [The Superficial]

• Merideth Viera asked Star Jones if she would ever marry a gay man … things got a little uncomfortable after that. [R&M]

• Will Farrell is awkward, even in real life. Yeah, we kind of freak out around our stalkers, too. [Matt Belitsky]

• John Travolta could do drag. Why not? It can't be worse than Look Who's Talking Too. [MSNBC]

• Ellen Barkin lets everyone know she's choking by standing up and screaming "I'm going to die!" Before she starts actually choking, of course. [Page Six]