Want to ingratiate yourself to a dying relative under false pretenses? Just follow the NYT's advice and send your sickly aunt a disingenuous thank-you! With luck, you still have time to weasel your way into her good graces before she takes a turn for the worst! From yesterday's thoughtful piece on thank-you etiquette:

“If you want to be sure to be included in a will, always send thank-you notes for all presents,” said Jeffrey Condon, an estate-planning lawyer in Santa Monica, Calif. “Do it out of self-interest. The giver you thank will never know the difference, cynical as it sounds.”

Unless, of course, the aging "giver" happens to be a fellow New York Times subscriber, who likewise read yesterday's Sunday Styles, and shuddered after (correctly!) perceiving it to be a morbid step-by-step on "How to cash in on your inheritance." In which case, said elderly person may be slightly put off by the fact that you've suddenly "remembered" to belatedly thank them for that heinous cardigan they sent you in Christmas of '03.

And even more skeptical of your politely worded inquiry regarding his/her health.