The End Of An Era Characterized By Juvenile Humor, Biting Social Commentary And A Propensity For Overly Wordy Headlines
It seems like only yesterday that I first set my alarm for the ungodly hour of 7am, spilled piping hot coffee all over my impractically thin sweater* and introduced myself as your brand new Jossip editor.
As expected, I was greeted by a predictable deluge of "Hello Newman" jokes, a litany of detractors and a relative minority of staunch supporters, whose generous praise – or at least intermittent approval – was only slightly undermined by their stubborn insistence on referring to me as "Corynne."
And while I had my share of missteps – an unnatural fixation on a picture of Hillary Clinton eating a sandwich, an ill-advised confrontation with a would-be heckler, and an overzealous response to a crazed Jared Leto fan – I prefer to focus instead on the brief, shining flashes of mediocrity.
Ideally, my legacy will reflect the revealing look behind your secret social networking practices, the somewhat less revealing insight into Martha Stewart's firing practices and the long, rambling diatribes that probed Anna Nicole Smith's legacy, Ann Coulter's fatal weakness, Anna Wintour's inscrutability and everything in between.
But the time has come for a new year, a fresh start and possibly even an employment opportunity replete with semi-regular hours, fringe benefits and enough colleagues to participate in a (theoretical) four-on-four basketball tournament.**
And so I bid you a cheerful farewell, and offer a thousand thanks to my boss/mentor/contemporary David Hauslaib, my co-conspirator, Rebecca "I Went To Barnard, Not To Be Confused With Columbia" Aronauer and, of course, to all of you for the many wonderful memories.
If you're ever feeling bored or nostalgic, please don't hesitate to peruse the Jossip archives and/or drop me a line. As always, I'll be sure to ignore/respond accordingly, and forward any/all misdirected (read: inadvertently complimentary) emails to my worthy predecessor, Corynne.
*A move that would quickly become my early-morning trademark
Best of luck to you, Debbie! It's been a pleasure working with you.
You'll definitely be missed. No one can craft a successful strike-through quip like Debbie Newman. No one.
You are the greatest. It was such an amazing experience working with you! Great picture choice, minus the fact that it looks like we're in two different pics.
the salad guys at LA Caters and I will miss you most of all.