Oh, holidays. Three day weekends. Memorial Day. All the wonderful things that low level editorial assistants, interns, and office managers get to work overtime during so their bosses can go to the Hamptons.

But if you're one of the lucky ones who doesn't have a real job, or has a sugar daddy with a Park Avenue penthouse, this post's for you. Now that there are clubs in the Hamptons, blogger in the Hamptons, and even New York mag journos looking for waiters to write stories about in the Hamptons, it's no longer just a place for crazed PR people to run over droves of party goers or over privileged kids to bark out racial slurs.

We won't be there, but we hope you will try to take advantage of some of the wonderful things this great Long Island beachfront has to over. (Cue cheesy music in your head.)

• Omg, omg, omg. VMA parties? We so bet Carson Daily will come from the beaches of LA to the beaches of NY just to try and tongue you at Boutique! [Shecky's]

• We already told you Pink Elephant (pictured) would be opening. So, we hope you're already on the list.

• The party boys think you should go to the opening of Cain in South Hampton. We love the idea of a bunch of WASPS chilling in an African safari inspired club. Please, please send photos. [Urban Daddy]

• We hear from the coolest person we know that Star Room is going to be jumpin' jumpin'. But, if it sucks, you can blame us for blowing up your spot. If the New York article a few years ago didn't do that already.

• Oh, and we guess at some point, you're going to have to eat, so the new Hamptons blog, The Beach, is there to help you find some alternatives to white wine spritzers. Be prepared for long lines and mediocre service. [The Beach]

And if you're somebody who just loves their job so much you can't force yourself to leave it (or you're just broke) we understand. And we'll be blogging Friday and Monday … so send us your gossip bitches!