Let’s say you worked at a paper that had gone through four senior editors in three years and the general state of journalism was like your toilet after a big cup of coffee. And let’s say you lived in Los Angeles. And how about we quit the hypotheticals and say you work for the L.A. Times?

Well, then Jim O’Shea’s departure couldn’t have felt good. Because when he was ousted, he either was supremely bitter or incredibly honest—or maybe a little bit of both—and basically said the whole Times operation was crap. You’re probably interested in another job, but resigned to the fact that finding a new position at a paper on par with the L.A. Times is next to impossible.

But fear not, Sam Zell, owner of the Tribune Co., came in to make everyone feel better by talking smack on O’Shea, saying "[O'Shea] pissed all over the company where he worked for over 30 years.” But lest any reporters would take issue, Zell won them over by encouraging porn watching at work as long as masturbating and sexual harassment didn't get in the way of deadlines.

What a kidder. But seriously, your jobs are not secure.