Much like its foray into the shadowy world of J.T. LeRoy, Vanity Fair's stalking of embroiled private eye Anthony Pellicano doesn't reveal anything much, well, new. While Bryan Burrough and John Connolly's full treatment is available online, it'll also arrive in the June issue (on New York newsstands May 3) where, we suspect, it'll get some coverline play, a decent pictorial spread, and endless pages jumped to the back of the book.

But all hope isn't lost. Just because VF will insist you read thousands of words to embrace yourself in all that is Pellicano doesn't mean you have to. Forthwith, we've broken down the juicy pieces into digestable, media attention span-size morsels.

• Pellicano had a war room straight out of Hollywood. That said, for all his high tech goodies, his wiretapping was unimpressively low-tech: In order to tap phone lines with different area codes than his 310, he had to rent apartments in those area codes and install a separate computer.

• Pellicano's work with Paramount honcho Brad Grey was "extensive" — and let's us drop boldface names like Adam Sandler and Brad Pitt.

• Attorney Bert Fields and Pellicano were so close, the P.I. considered converting to Judaism. And not the celebrity version that lets you tie a red string on your wrist and call yourself religious.

• Pellicano was an asshole to his wife and a bastard to his kids. But you probably already assumed that.

Inside Hollywood's Big Wiretap Scandal [Bryan Burrough and John Connolly, Vanity Fair]