America is a nation of obese whiners, that much is obvious. But perhaps nothing is more sad and futile than the typical overweight office drone who hits upon some new miracle cure by trying to circumvent the traditional "eat healthy and exercise" routine that somehow escapes our cultural understanding.

Not to point fingers, as the sedentary lifestyle affects bloggers as much if not more than desk jockeys (office workers can't get away with getting paid without ever getting out of bed in the morning), but something has to change when your previously whiskey-lean journalists start carrying around an extra keg.

But the idea that attaching a hospital tray table for your laptop onto your NordicTrack (assuming you still have a NordicTrack), or even more ridiculously, an office desk treadmill just reeks of those extreme lengths Americans will go through to avoid, say, actual exercise.