Devoted American Idol fans will undoubtedly flip over rumors that Fox is looking to maintain its three judge format, while replacing its entertainingly drunk judge, Paula Abdul.

And as if that wasn't enough, there are already whispers regarding candidates lined up as potential replacements.

One of these far more presentable ladies is none other than Courtney Love herself, who recently grabbed headlines for her New Year's resolutions (sample: "sell the pony;" "stay pissed at the world"), her failure at online dating and the newly released details of her heroin-induced birth.

Here's the full report:

Courtney Love tells Usmagazine.com exclusively that American Idol wants her!

Love reveals to her favorite magazine Web site that Idol's executive producer Nigel Lythgoe called her office last week inquiring into whether she would be interested in sitting in as a judge on the hit FOX show.

"He called," Love tells Usmagazine.com. "He was wondering if I was interested. I thought it was kind of weird but brilliant."

Clearly, we think Love would be the only practical choice, seeing as her consummate professionalism and recent drug history dictates a strict adherence to amphetamines and other so-called uppers, rather than Paula's continued reliance on Debbie Downer type substances, such as alcohol and painkillers.

So Courtney—best of luck to you in the auditions, and remember: Simon's the asshole, Randy's the sometimes-fat one and you're the one who's so drugged up you don't even realize how badly all of the contestants suck.