Earlier this month, T:Style magazine fashion director Horacio Silva lent his byline to the Times proper — to write a mostly scathing review of Tom Ford's new store on Madison Avenue. Now in his New York mag egofest, Ford responds to claims that his store might, possibly, maybe, by chance, coulda-woulda-shoulda been rude to a customer.

Honestly, he’s a little hurt by some reviews of his new store, and the talk that’s been going on about him among the fashion clique, and I’ve been summoned here for an unexpected meeting. The New York Times sent an undercover reporter who wrote that, among other offenses, Ford’s scowling doorman made him feel like Oprah at Hermès. “It was a nasty article, and I was upset, of course,” says Ford. “Though, honestly, with something like a secret shopper, how do I even know for sure the man came into the store? But I will do better.” He sighs. “Maybe people who have known me as innovating in terms of silhouette or fashion are irritated in a way that I’ve chosen to play a different game, and not their game. We are running a business that’s not for everyone, and I’m not trying to be an asshole, but some people can’t afford it and maybe there is a sort of resentment about that.”

Let's recap: Horacio Silva, the fashion director at the Times' style magazine, does not fit into Tom Ford's fashion clique? (He does.) And he's a liar? (Not even about his age.) And he's an undercover reporter? (He's easily recognizable.) And he can't afford Tom Ford's clothing? (Silva is a man who keeps Christian Dior candles on display in his bathroom. We know, we've been there.)

Sounds like someone's exposed penis touched sour grapes. And they stung.