Poor, Monica. You'd think earning a Master's degree from the London School of Economics would be enough to finally garner you some respect. But alas, it's nearly 2007, and yet no matter what you do, it seems as though you'll always be remembered as Bill Clinton's favorite blue dress-wearing, cigar-holding intern.

Well, we here at Jossip are full of Christmas cheer (and/or tipsy from grandma's eggnog — that gasbag isn't kidding around) and we've decided that everyone, yes everyone, deserves a second chance. So we've decided to find out more about the real Monica Samille Lewinsky, the one nobody's ever really taken the time to get to know.

The Monica who was born in San Francisco, California on July 23rd, 1973, and attended private school with Tori Spelling, (back when Spelling was still living in a pre-nose job, still-mooching-off-of-Daddy existence). The Monica who had a fledgling career as a reality TV star, before making the pragmatic decision to sell handbags instead.

And, of course, the Monica who inspired the grossest sandwich in Morningside Heights (appropriately titled "The Lewinsky,) served on a toasted hero, and topped with its trademark "secret sauce."

And so ends our leisurely stroll down Monica Lewinsky Memory Lane. Now back to The Donald and Rosie Show.